[It's Not All] Sunshine and Rainbows

It’s confession time, team. For those of you who follow me on Instagram (or for those of you who follow ANYONE on Instagram), it always looks great. Everything is perfect. Van life is perfect. The sun is shining. The birds are chirping. Lalalalalala.

I am super excited about my new life and I’m really enjoying it, BUT, for honesty’s sake, I thought it was only fair to point out some of the less-than-ideal realities of my new nomad-ish existence. Please feel free to laugh. It’s funny, I promise.

1.It’s hot as fuck here in the south in the summer. And I live in a van. No, I don’t have AC (unless the car is running). I am very sweaty a lot of the time. My hair is sticking out in several different directions. I find lots of excuses to loiter in air-conditioned businesses. And I go swimming in the river A LOT.

2.Emergency bathroom needs. No, the van does not have a toilet. It DOES have various types of interesting plastic receptacles, including a specially designated yellow Nalgene bottle. It works. Its awkward and weird, but it works. I ripped all these ideas off of other people, BTW. WANNA KNOW MORE? Just ask!!

3.I drove away from Oregon with a slightly broken heart. There’s nothing like driving off into the sunset to start your new and exciting life that you’ve been dreaming about! There’s also nothing like periodically experiencing a brief but noticeably uncomfortable sensation somewhat akin to being stabbed in the chest with a dull fork. NOW, I take full responsibility here; I brought this on myself 100%, knew exactly what I was getting myself into, and am not faulting the other party involved one bit. But, it still sucked. SO, sometimes, I would just take a deep breath and say to myself, “Now, Erin, no matter what happens, by the time the sun rises tomorrow…. you will have peed in a Nalgene bottle at least once”. See?! All better!!

4.I stepped in gum today. Gum is extra gummy when its 90 degrees and 137% humidity out.

5. Friends! I miss my friends. I’ve already made some new ones ‘cause Southerners are really friendly. Also, I’m quite happy to shamelessly invite myself to things and/or beg people to hang out with me, offer to buy them beer, etc. Its working, and I fully expect to be surrounded by a herd of amazing humans before I depart from my first travel assignment. But…I miss my Oregon people.

6. Showers! I joined the local 24-hour budget gym specifically so I could take a shower whenever I want. So, I mean, I can take a shower whenever I need to, and that’s great. They are a little janky, though. If somebody flushes the toilet in the bathroom, the water pressure goes down noticeably. The water in one of the showers is permanently way too hot. Also, one of the showers is missing a door. Of note, I did take a bath in a bucket in my van in the hospital parking lot this morning because I was running late and didn’t have time to go to the gym first. I actually looked totally presentable afterwards; you would have been really impressed! I even put on mascara! All the same, next time you take a shower in the privacy of your own home, just, you know, appreciate it a little bit.

Alright, well, time to stop complaining about my First World Van Life problems and go to the laundromat. Although I guess I could just wash my clothes in a bucket…